Day 80 Friday 17th June 2011

Dedicated to Gramp

Today has been a funny old day. It started really well and I had every intention of going for my swim, the sun was out, blue sky, the water looked lovely, but I kept putting it off and told myself I’d go in the afternoon. It never happened.

My mind has been working overtime today and I can’t seem to stop worrying. My Mum is moving house today and I wish that I could have been there to help. Her house had been on the market for over 3 years. It also marks the beginning for her, of starting over, on her own.

I’m so sad that I can’t be there to support her. I called her to wish her luck today and it broke my heart, Mum sounded so lost. That’s the problem when you live thousands of miles away – I feel so helpless. Truth be told, I’ve hardly slept this week, due to worry – I have unleashed the worry monster and I can’t seem to get him back in to his cave!

Today it would have been my Gramps birthday and for some reason, more so than other years, he’s really been on my mind today. He passed away in 1999 and I miss him so much. He was a huge part of my life. He loved photography, he loved Spike Milligan and Louis Armstrong. He was a kind, wise, incredible, unforgettable man.

I remember when I was growing up how we’d talked about just the two of us going to New Orléans for a holiday to listen to all the Jazz and blues music. I think I must have been only about 12 or 13, sadly we never went. We were also going to wing-walk on an old aeroplane to raise money for the British Heart Foundation, but my Nan wouldn’t hear a word of it (he’d just had major heart surgery). One day, I would love to do both of these things – for him, especially the New Orléans trip.

As a whole, my family think that whenever we hear the song Wonderful World by Louis Armstrong, it’s as though my Gramp is around and saying hello. It happens very often.

He was also a sea man. He used to be in the Navy, but unfortunately caught T.B and had to leave.

I think Gramp is not only responsible for my love of photography but also of why I love the ocean as much as I do. I like to think that he is somewhere, with his foot tapping, whilst listening to Louis, looking at my photographs with a smile on his face.

Happy Birthday Gramp – this one’s for you.

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9 comments on “Day 80 Friday 17th June 2011”

  1. He sounds like a truly wonderful man. Maybe it is just everything else on top of your Grand dads birthday that is cause such strong emotions but it is a great thing to worry as you do. It shows care and kindness and love all excellent traits! Both trips sound awesome. I too want to visit New Orleans, the music appeals greatly to me. Have a good day and to me no one is truly gone as long as you can remember them. It is the effect on the world and the people they knew around them that was important, not there physical body. Don’t know if it helps, hopefully it may.
    Astra Wally

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  2. You know what really helps me when I worry? I write everything down, as in a letter. For me it are letters to God, but still, really think it helps too if you don’t believe. I put them in a little box, and it really helps to clear my mind. Your granddad sounds really great. Good luck today 🙂

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    • Thank you, that’s a very good idea. I should start doing that, it will be a way of clearing my mind, I will try it. Thank you for suggesting it 🙂 My Grandfather really was a great man – the best. 🙂

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  3. Thanks for dropping by. This is a gorgeous photo. And I loved reading about your Gramps.

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  4. I’d say the trip to New Orleans is a must after reading your ode to gramps… maybe not the wing walking… lol… but what better reason is there to plan a future trip, as I’m pretty sure he’d be there right with you too… smiling down… You never ever forget them do you… fortunately…

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    • You are absolutely right, I really must go one day, for him and for me, you’re also right on the wing walking… when i was 12 or 13 that would have been amazing – but now I’m all grown up and sensible lol. – I feel so lucky to have had him in my life and I’m so glad I have so many happy memories of him that I will treasure for a lifetime.

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  5. Beautiful photo and post….

    sending you a big hug from Denver. 🙂

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